NOTICE OF SUSPENSION
Pursuant to the Universal Code of Dubious Decisions (UCDD § 42-LOL), this domain has been INDEFINITELY SUSPENDED due to an excessive accumulation of regrettable life choices by the domain owner.
The Bureau of Questionable Life Choices (BQLC) has determined that the operator of this domain has engaged in a pattern of behavior deemed incompatible with responsible internet stewardship. Such actions include, but are not limited to:
- Repeatedly choosing pineapple on pizza.
- Maintaining a collection of outdated flip phones "for nostalgia."
- Attempting to set a personal record for consecutive days wearing sweatpants.
This suspension is effective immediately and shall remain in place until the domain owner demonstrates a commitment to better decision-making, such as learning to parallel park or eating a vegetable voluntarily.
APPEAL PROCESS
To appeal this suspension, the domain owner must submit a 500-word essay titled "Why I Will Never Again Trust a 'Free Cruise' Offer" to the BQLC. Alternatively, the owner may attend a mandatory seminar on "How to Adult Without Causing an International Incident."
Contact the BQLC
Think this is a mistake? Tell us why your life choices are *actually* defensible.